Jewellery expert debunks the most common engagement myths

When it comes to engagements, traditions run deep – but not all of them hold up today. From outdated rules about who should propose to the history behind getting down on one knee, there are plenty of myths which may not reflect how couples approach engagements today.

Lorna Haddon, Head of Diamonds and Jewellery at Beaverbrooks, said: "Getting engaged can be one of the most exciting life experiences for those in love – but it can sometimes be a nervous experience for those doing the proposing, with so many traditions to remember.

"The most important thing for anybody looking to get engaged is to decide what feels right for you both as a couple. More people are moving away from set rules and focusing on what makes their proposal and ring choice feel special and personal to their significant other."

Here, Lorna debunks some of the most common engagement myths.

The man must propose
"Traditionally, it's been expected that the man proposes in a heterosexual relationship – but that's changing. More women are now choosing to pop the question themselves, and couples are increasingly viewing proposals as a shared decision. Some even opt for joint proposals, making the moment feel more personal and meaningful for both partners."

A ring should cost three months' salary
"This is one of the most common engagement misconceptions, but just as the saying goes, 'you can't put a price on love', and the same applies to the amount you 'should' spend on an engagement ring. What matters most is finding a ring that feels meaningful and special to you and your partner, and factor these into your budget. At Beaverbrooks, the average spend on an engagement ring is around £2,000 – but there's no rulebook. Some people like a showstopping diamond, while others prefer a delicate and understated style – it's all about personal choice, not price."

Bigger is better
"While carat size can seem like the most important factor, it's the cut that has the biggest impact on how much a diamond sparkles. At Beaverbrooks, we believe cut is key – it determines how well the light reflects through the diamond and creates that beautiful fire and brilliance. Even a diamond with a high carat weight or top clarity can look dull if the cut isn't right. So rather than focusing on size alone, it's worth looking for a diamond that's been expertly cut to truly sparkle."

The ring must be a surprise
"Although some people love the idea of a surprise proposal with a ring that's been chosen for them, many couples now prefer to choose the piece together. It's a big decision, and shopping together means you'll find something that truly suits your style and lifestyle. Some even opt for a temporary proposal ring so they can choose the final design together later."

The ring must be worn on the 'wedding finger'
"As the story goes, Ancient Romans chose the fourth finger of the left hand to represent romance as they believed it was the only finger with a vein connecting straight to the heart. Although modern medicine has disproven this myth, the tradition remains.

"Many Western cultures still opt for the left hand, whilst couples in countries such as Norway, Germany and Greece wear theirs on the right hand. Ultimately, there are no rules dictating which finger – or hand – your engagement or wedding ring should be worn on, and many modern couples are experimenting with engagement and wedding ring placements."

You must get down on one knee
"Traditionally, proposals involve getting down on one knee, which stems from medieval knights bowing before noblewomen as a show of respect. While some love the romantic symbolism, others prefer a more relaxed or spontaneous moment that feels natural to them. The most important thing is that the proposal feels authentic and personal – whether that means kneeling or not."

To explore the latest engagement ring trends from Beaverbrooks, visit www.beaverbrooks.co.uk/engagement-ring-trends